Yeah Yeah Yeah!

I am on a serious high right now.

Classes started Monday, and even though I was stressed to the max borderline pulling my hair out (and cried multiple times today…for unrelated reasons – see Lauren’s most recent blog post), I am in the best mood I’ve been in for quite a while.

School.  So Monday morning I woke up at 5am with butterflies in my stomach, anxious and excited about the first day of school.  I had come into work over the weekend to prepare for my classes and to get myself into the mindset somehow.  I got to work extra early, checked my emails and facebook messages, and went pee at least three times.  I found out somewhere along the way that my Adult Health course (which was supposed to be scheduled 5 times per week) is only scheduled 3 times per week, and my Physical Assessment course (which was supposed to be booked 3 times per week) is not even on the schedule at all!  Since I am leaving in 6 weeks time, these courses need to be finished very quickly.  And anyone who went through nursing can tell you that Adult Health cannot be rushed.  There is a ton of material and it is intense at the best of times – it is all new and extremely important knowledge.  Needless to say, it was a rough start to the day.  But things were looking up when Constance came into the office she told me she would come with me to my class to introduce me and go over ground rules (she would). 

We walk into my first Adult Health class. I set up the General Nursing laptop and projector (later found out it is semi-broken and nearly impossible to get on a good day, and therefore I am now going to start the grueling and tedious process of turning two months worth of powerpoint work into word documents – fuck.), and stood by Constance as she borderline-yelled at the students for offences they had yet to commit.  No Coming In Late.  No Signing For Friends On The Attendance List.  No Cellphones In Class.  The usual, in other words.  It’s been less than a year since I was in those student’s shoes.  I was hearing the lecture from Constance as a student and yet somehow as a teacher.  It was very strange.  I rolled my eyes but also felt the unavoidable foreboding of consequences.  After her schpeel was done, I got to interact with my class for the first time.  My class.  I’ve been so excited to meet them, and this might be biased, but after day 1 I can already tell you: they kick ass.

When I was a student, I was the kid that interacted with teachers.  I was a teacher’s pet – not because I wanted to suck up and get good grades, but because I love learning, and have always found that interaction (answering a question when asked, asking questions, and just generally being involved in class time) is how I learn best.  Naturally, this is how I would want my classes to go.  And today, that’s exactly how they went.

Before talking about class, I feel that some background info should be shared on Rwanda’s education system is necessary: In Rwanda, depending on how you do on your “placement exam” in high school, you are put into whichever program that test shows you would do well in.  AKA: The Man tells you what you are doing with your life, if you will do anything at all.  So my students did not choose to go into nursing, they were put there based on the results of one examination.  This brings obvious difficulties and frustrations, namely that there are now many students trying to study for a profession they have no passion for. .  It makes for some very desolate classes sometimes.  In nursing specifically, this causes a lot of problems, since these people will be giving care to the countries population.  If they don’t give a shit about nursing, quality of care is almost non-existent.  However, for some of my students, it is clear: They wanted to be nurses all along.  But, others wanted to be doctors, some wanted to work in IT, some have passion for various arts programs, and some – like many people my age – don’t know what they want to do.  I’ve never had to inspire passion before.  Now that I am trying to start I am realizing how hard it truly is, and why it is so unbelievably important and amazing.

Nevertheless, these students are so bright.  They are attentive and interested and eager to learn.  On that first class, they blew me out of the water.  And they have continued to do so all week.  

I feel like I can relate to these students, having just been where they are now.  I know how shitty careplans are to do and how long they take, but having graduated I also know how important they are and how much they contribute to critical thinking.  I know how much material there is to cover and how difficult some of these concepts are to grasp.  I know how great this course can be, having learnt it from one of the best professors I’ve ever had.  I know how amazing it feels to understand the mechanism of heart failure after hours of lecture and reading and trying to stay awake.  I know how comforting it is to feel like you can talk to your teacher and how much dignity and confidence can be gained when they treat you as equals.  I know nothing about teaching other people.  But I know how they feel, and I am now in the odd position of seeing each side perfectly clear – student and teacher.  And now I’m starting to understand how wonderful it is to see their eyes, to almost be able to hear their brains click when they understand a new concept.   To have them laugh with me when I do a role-play exercise of a 90 year old sick patient who still wants to have sex with her husband.  To have them feel comfortable and confident to ask questions and not stop until they get the answer.  To feel support from them and to support them.  I am very grateful and very lucky to have such a remarkable class.  I am not an educator, so I feel so appreciative that they are easing me into it and helping me learn about teaching.

I feel connected to them.

I am so excited to teach this course.